So. That was…. interesting?
I don’t really know what to say about this episode except that it left me unfulfilled. It was just kind of a cluster Funky Cold Medina of an episode. But I guess we’ll get to all of that as we go through it. So let’s get to it!
Last Week: Kelly is still gone, Abby had auditions, and there’s some new wallflower mom.
LIVIN’ ON THE DANCE FLOOR!!! Phew. That really takes it outta me.
So here we are back at the studio. Where’s Shelley? No one knows. This chick probably already had enough and bailed. But the moms aren’t having any of this crap. They want Kelly back. They’re gonna take a stand.
In they walk to the studio. Straight to the bathroom? Not sure what happened there.
So out they walk from the bathroom, and they head into the front office and sit in the waiting room. Abby tries to spew some words out of her gigantic gullet, but to no avail. The moms will not respond.
Ho. Ly. Crap.
This is the biggest protest since the 99%ers strolled their stinky asses all over Zuccotti Park. I don’t mean to exaggerate here, but this is pretty much the Civil Rights Movement again. But with rich, white ladies. Right white ladies who are mad at their dance teacher.
But I mean, it’s pretty much the same thing.
Anyway, Abby is pissed at the disappearance of the moms. She calls Melissa to find out what the hell is going on, but Melissa doesn’t answer. So Abby leaves her a menacing message about hating her kids or some crap.
Oh well, “the show must go on!” So new mom Shelley and new girl Ally are the only girls there. Abby rehearses Ally and Shelley comes down to tell her she doesn’t know what’s going on. Thanks for that gem, lady. Abby tells her that she doesn’t know what’s going on either, but that Melissa is a dummy for not bringing Maddie in.
“Do you think this is about Kelly?” Drrrrrrrrrrr. This Shelley…. She’s somethin’.
Abby asks Ally if she has any ideas what’s going on. Just another blank stare. What a mother-daughter combo. Shelley suggests that it’s just the moms, because the kids probably have no say. Abby retorts by saying she started her company when she was fourteen, which is totally irrelevant in this discussion, but thanks.
She says that these kids could get to dance if they wanted to without they’re parents. They could get a ride from anyone. Especially a creepy guy with a mustache and tinted glasses inside a windowless white cargo van. WHEEEEE!!!
Abby is back in the foyer now, still wondering where the moms are. She wants to do pyramid, dammit! Psh. Who needs pyramids? Besides Egyptians. And Mayans. But they were dumb anyway (read: we’re still here in 2013).
So no one has any idea what’s going on, until finally at the end of the freakin’ day, when it’s already dark out, Abby finally sticks her head out to see all of the moms just chilling outside in one of their vans. Melissa is actually even sitting on the ground. Mkay.
Abby tells them they’re dumb for having this little “sit-in,” but I think it’s more of a “sit-out.” Christi likens Abby’s appearance outside to Jurassic Park, which is totally awesome because I can picture Abby walking up and water rippling in a cup on the dashboard. Abby tells them they’re replaced and high-tails it back inside.
Upon returning to the front desk, she calls the cops to get them to come tell the moms that they need to leave. What a doll.
Her plan is now to call some people who auditioned last week and see who can get to the studio in one night so that they can replace the ALDC girls. She even calls someone who she hears is “ten times better than Maddie.” But ten times better than Maddie is just Maddie’s dance skills minus dopey faces.
In news of random filler scenes that make no difference to the plot of the show, Jill happens to randomly be driving by Candy Apples Dance Studio and decides to pull in for some unknown reason.